I think we misnamed Eeyore. It would have been more appropriate to name him Abraham. It seemed for a while that he was going to have offspring in that sort of quantity. I am told that exaggeration will only make my point weaker so I will take this opportunity to get to the story.
Some of you may not think a donkey is a very romantic gift to give one’s beloved on your anniversary. That just shows you aren’t very practical. I thought about power tools but that didn’t seem to be romantic at all and I already had a good 18 volt cordless tool set. Besides,I remembered when our son gave our daughter in law a vacuum cleaner and I think things could have gone better.
I always have trouble finding a gift for Sally that gives me confidence. She always seems to like everything and is very gracious so it’s really just me. For years I had been telling her that we needed to acquire a self propelled, fertilizing and mulching lawn mower with an internal guidance system. One that would guard other livestock. A donkey. I know, right now you are envious because your McMansion does not have the acreage to support a living breathing mower of this description. Stifle yourself.
A 5 year old donkey jack for $100. On the morning of August 1st Sally slept in late. I am certain that she had difficulty sleeping the night before in anticipation of the gift I was going to deliver. I got up early and called about the ad. The man arranged to meet me at a gas station by Cleveland (Texas) which is perhaps a half hour drive. I told her I was taking Bob for a walk and he and I took off.
This picture is from file footage given to me by the man and not actually of the Eeyore delivery. That short eared mess is not Eeyore but if I recall correctly the trailer is the same. On the morning that the man delivered Eeyore he came with his daughter. I think she had wanted to be sure that her pride and joy was going to a good home.
We met as arranged. I stuck my hand in the stock trailer and the Donkey let me pull it back out with all fingers and thumb intact. I knew then that I had found the perfect present.
I talked the man into bringing him to our house. Money talks. We were just pulling up in the driveway when Sally came out the front door. I had thought we were being quiet but I guess not. Possibly Bob’s incessant barking at his new yard mate was the problem. Being naturally quick witted I shouted “happy anniversary”. The look on her face was worth all the planning and sneaking about. The dropped jaw, glazed eyes, and look of amazement all served to be my assurance that it was a complete surprise.
I guess the guy with the trailer and his daughter weren’t prepared for such a tender moment because he and his daughter began to shake. I assumed it was with compassion and appreciation at such a tender scene. In retrospect they may have been overcome with joy. Can’t ever tell about the local folks who sometimes are pretty red necked. When the tears stopped streaming down his face I offered him water. He declined so I gave him his money and he went on his way. Sometimes people just cannot understand the greatness of the moment or their place in history. He will be forever ignorant unless someone reads this article to him.
So there we stood. Two folks deeply in love and the symbol of that love. Unfortunately, that symbol showed no sign of appreciation for the moment. He was a lot happier munching on weeds than being petted. That was ok, that was a big reason for buying him.
Any woman worth her salt understands how to capture one’s heart. Food. Sure enough that’s how we earned the love, trust and respect of this fine animal and got him to come when called. With a burst of inspiration I decided to name him Eeyore.
Donkey’s are supposed to hate dogs but Eeyore and bob seemed to delight in nipping and barking/braying at each other. That got pretty tiresome as well if you were trying to sleep, or think, or whatever. Eeyore’s liking for dogs and general overall friendliness resulted in us getting more donkeys. I read and believed that donkey Jacks are only good for one thing. If you want a livestock guard you need a Jenny or a Gelding. Circumstances later forced us in that direction.
Eeyore proved adept at what jacks seem to do best, which is make more donkeys. His overabundance of testosterone showed itself at the most inopportune times, (when he had guests) but it was mostly all talk. When it came time to protect the homestead he had developed a fondness for our dogs that proved to be unfortunate.